Meal image courtesy of Pearl Butler, MA, LPC
There are times when one has to reflect on the beauty, joy, and support in his/her life. During the holidays family and friends gather to eat while acknowledging the appreciation of having survival essentials and the support of others during challenges or concerns. Is it appropriate to express life challenges and concerns during the holiday celebration?
Almost every family or friends gathering at the meal table during holiday seasons attempt to express some form of gratitude or request everyone make a statement of what they are thankful for before eating. There is a lot of concerns and struggles in society. There are wars, natural disasters, gun violence, financial struggles, lack of available affordable housing, food, daycare or eldercare services, an increase in mental and physical health concerns, reduction of kindness to other cultures/races/genders, and the increase in burnout symptoms. Even the resilient or financially secure are struggling with a life challenge or concern.
It would be mentally beneficial if an individual could share one thing to be thankful for and one thing that is challenging personally and professionally before diving into the holiday feast. During the holiday gatherings and meals there should be an abundance of individuals who care for each other. It may be an appropriate time to share positive and negative emotions and feeling and receive positive support. Maybe the statement of “being grateful” is to allow an individual to reduce negative feelings about concerns.
There may be others who have traumatic concerns that are greater than the individual has expressed. However, that statement can dismiss or ignore an individual’s cry for help or support. We are all human and for us to pretend that sharing our concerns and struggles mean we are not grateful or thankful is detrimental to the balance of one’s mental health. Holding in ones concerns and struggles and not expressing causes an emotional volcano of anger outbursts or worst… physical or gun violence! There has to be a balance of being thankful and being human who experience joy and pain!
So, I post this statement to suggest during the holidays that we allow individuals at the meal celebration to share a thankful statement and a concern or struggle that he/she maybe working through. However, if the intention of attending the holiday feast is just for the food and not the joy of connecting with family or friends maybe stay home and unpack the deep concerns and struggles that maybe leading the way you move forward in your life!
Happy Holidays! 🙂
Voices of Burnout (VOB) 